This was originally published by Kendra a few weeks ago and it really is a great lesson in receiving.
I was at my cousin’s wedding this weekend, having fun with my phone’s camera, when I saw one of the bridesmaid’s bouquets lying on the bride and groom table I decided to take a shot. It looked really pretty and the colors caught my eye.
Next thing you know, the wedding photographer came up to me and asked if I wanted some help taking the photo.
I politely declined.
Nah, I’m OK.
What I was really thinking in 0.5 of a second:
Help? Why would I need help taking a photo? I know how to work the camera on my phone.
What, does he think I’m not taking a good enough photo? I am doing this wrong?
I can’t let him help me because I have nothing to give him in return and I don’t want to be in his debt.
Hence the No Thank You.
Seeing right through me, he insisted, and proceeded to help anyway. In less than 30 seconds, he set up his portable lighting, used some focus feature on my phone’s camera that I had no clue existed, and proceed to create this work of art.
And he didn’t even want anything in return. My thanks, gratitude, and the smile on my face was apparently enough.
This whole interaction probably took about 2 minutes tops. Yet it taught me something I’ll carry with me the rest of my life. Aside from having a photo that now popped instead of just looking nice, and learning a new trick with my camera, I had a lesson in receiving.
It dawned up me how closed off I am to freely receiving. It comes relatively easy when I can logically justify it. I’ve done X, so sure, I can receive Y. Or, it’s my birthday, or Christmas and so that’s just what I’m supposed to do… get presents. Or, OK I’ll give in this time, but I’ve got it next time.
But is that really free? If you think about it, I’m still playing by a set of rules that doesn’t really feel good. Pride, worthiness, and guilt comes into the picture, and wining that game doesn’t really feel like a win.
I had to ask myself, what if I just didn’t play that game in the first place?
What if I don’t need to earn it, prove my worth, or be able to reciprocate a gift. What if I could trust, and act from a place within where I believed that I am enough as I am to receive the gifts that are there for the taking. Just because I am.
What if I leaned in to the nuggets of Truth & Love that give me permission to open my arms and my heart to the assistance that is right there in front of me. Willingly, without resistance.
Without worrying about whether or not I #deserve it, or what it means now that I’ve received it. To know that I’m not in anyone’s debt.
That feels free.
To let myself be delighted in. To have my smile become someone else’s joy.
Here’s a Truth for you: You were made to receive. Your existence in and of itself is a testament to this. You didn’t have to do anything to be fed, clothed, or loved. You are, and always were, worthy.
You don’t have to do anymore to deserve what it is you desire. All you have to do is say yes, thank you. Yes universe, higher power, Creator, God, and even Camera Man. Sure, you can help. Yes, I will receive with open arms the gift you have for my life. I will trust you know something I don’t and that you can really make the picture of my life pop. Here’s my camera. I’ll let you do your thing.